Are you a "heavy trader"? - Consider this: Under a bill approved yesterday by a House committee, if you have over 1,000 mp3s in a folder on your computer (as the average college student typically does), and that folder is ever shared, even briefly, using Kazaa or similar peer-to-peer software, you have committed a federal criminal offense punishable by jail time. No tolerance? Let's call it no intelligence.

Meanwhile, Ben came across this story touting a sophisticated new study by a Harvard Business School prof which suggests that downloading doesn't hurt record sales one iota. Just makes all that legislatin' and crim'nalizin' seem especially silly.

Karl, Karl, come on out! - Boy, I feel out of the loop when I haven't even heard about some piece of legislation that drew hundreds of protestors to hang out on Karl Rove's lawn. Ben, surely you know what the DREAM Act is? (Something about illegal immigrants and education.)

A Long Post - In Drew's latest column in The New Republic, he attempts to fisk a recent WSJ piece by iconoclastic black author Shelby Steele, who takes a skeptical view of comparisons between the fight for same-sex marriage and the black stuggle for equality. Steele argues:

But gay marriage is simply not a civil rights issue. It is not a struggle for freedom. It is a struggle of already free people for complete social acceptance and the sense of normalcy that follows thereof -- a struggle for the eradication of the homosexual stigma. Marriage is a goal because, once open to gays, it would establish the fundamental innocuousness of homosexuality itself. Marriage can say like nothing else that sexual orientation is an utterly neutral human characteristic, like eye-color. Thus, it can go far in diffusing the homosexual stigma.

Frankly, I think Steele is exactly right. Government sanction indisputably tells us -- once and for all -- we're normal, we're okay, we're the same as everyone else. (Leave aside for now the politicized question of whether the goal of normalcy is appropriate.) It is precisely for this reason that mainstream American (and not just the bigot brigade) hesitates on the threshhold of granting such recognition. I think many are beginning to see civil unions -- a "separate but equal" categorization -- as the legal choice best reflecting their ambivalence about us. The comfort level just isn't there when it comes to homosexuality, and thus marriage is a step too far.

Drew claims "Marriage rights for homosexuals have not been dressed up as a civil rights issue as a means to sell them to the broader public." That probably true: they've been dressed up that way to convince the judiciary, and to great effect. The public by and large remains unpersuaded, though the conversation continues. Not that it's been bad strategy: Grumblings about activist judges aside, I would argue that American society is willing to let itself be coaxed into doing the right thing by cultural elites, even if they want to take their time getting there.

Setting aside the civil rights analogy, Steele sets out into revolutionary territory. He delineates how, unlike the races, the "two sexual orientations are profoundly -- not innocuously -- different." Understanding marriage to be primarily about procreation and child raising, he proposes that "gays can never be more than pretenders to an institution so utterly grounded" in such activities. Steele actually means this benignly. He proposes enshrining the "separate but equal" nature of our relationships though civil unions, thereby allowing gays to forego "mimickry" of marriage in favor of a "quiet self-acceptance" that would "lead the way to authentic institutions" of our own.

It's easy to slam such notions as Uncle Tom-ism, and Drew doesn't hold back. But I think he fails to engage Steele on the basic connundrum of gay normalcy and gay institutions. First, in the journey from a straight upbringing to adult self-acceptance, every gay person endures a degree of estrangement from his or her own family unlike anything other minorities experience. This has long been a motif in Drew's writings:

Most blacks grow up in black families. Most blacks spend their most formative years in black culture; almost all gays grow up in straight culture. ... [H]omosexuals live in a world in which integration -- at least until adulthood -- is universal. The innocuousness of their difference--the difference between them and their straight siblings and straight parents -- is clear in the early years. It is only when gays leave their parental homes that they look back and see the locks changed and the doors bolted against them. Enforcing segregation against people already separate is noxious enough. Enforcing it against people who have grown up in integrated homes is to wrench human beings into an emotional and social ghetto that is as toxic as it is unnecessary.

For Sullivan, same-sex marriage is the magic cure for this deep-seated emotional trauma. Steele would retort that self-acceptance is more important than how society treats you. For many of us, our own self-acceptance has taught our families how to love us. Sullivan, however, believes that process can be only partly successful without inclusion in society's most important institution. Here he implicitly raises the second half of the connundrum -- that of gay institutions. Unlike black churches and other ethnic communities, gay institutions will forever be foreign to the next generation of young gays. Sure, we find our way to them and work hard to make them familiar, but integrating them into our lives is always going to be challenge, generation after generation.

The better argument, then, against Steele's utopian vision of proud homosexual uniqueness is that it does nothing to address the basic need to heal the rift between gays and their families. Because every generation of gay kids is forced to build itself up to self-acceptance, the notion that they can ever feel completely comfortable in institutions created by their unrelated predecessors is useless. Sullivan's implicit argument is that getting married, for gays, is all about coming home again. And he may be right to worry that journey can't ever be fully achieved through the alien vehicle of civil unions.

GOP Hosts "Gay Summit" - Republican congressional leaders are today hosting a "gay summit" in an bid to regain credibility among the homosexual community. The event, held on Capitol Hill and to be addressed by some of America's most prominent gay public servants, will suggest measures such as nominating a teacher within each public school to aid students bullied over their sexuality. Meanwhile, a senior Democratic congressional source called it a "hollow, opportunistic stunt" and said gay voters would remember the Republicans' record, not their words.

As if. That's the report from Britain, about the Tories, as reported in today's Guardian. Happy April Fool's, a couple of days early.

Universal Access to Porn Act - I guess that's what you get when you combine the President's Internet access goal with the Fourth Circuit's decision striking down Virginia's anti-online porn law. Howard Bashman notes the divided panel may make a rehearing more likely.

Are your neighbors blue or red? - As the WaPo reports, spying on your neighbors -- always a fun pasttime -- has moved into the 21st century with the Neighbor Search function at fundrace.org. Check out the political fundraising in your town today!

Google This! - Proving once again that there's no technology others can innovate that it can't engulf and ruin -- er, "embrace and extend" -- Microsoft recently announced its plans to go after the Internet search engine market. This surely means that the perennial latecomer will once again offer us an inferior product that's so inextricably intertwined with its monopoly OS or business software that you won't have any choice but to use it. (Oh, trust us, you really do need a search bar on your MS Word menu!)

Really, does Steve Ballmer have, at long last, no sense of decency? Can't he use even a portion of Redmond's vast hordes of cash to create something new that others haven't already thought of? Sometimes I wonder if they ever have an original thought in their entire collective hive brain. Besides, I'm sure this is partly a ploy to shroud Google's upcoming IPO in a fog of FUD.

Built-In Obsolescence - I feel so much better about my PS2 purchase last summer, after this report on the game console's asserted longevity. I may, however, soon need an HDTV adapter kit. But what a coup to bring William Hung to the PlayStation confab! Somebody's got an extension on his 15 minutes.

Not in This Country, Buddy! - With OneMillionMoms.com nagging and the FCC censuring Janet's breast, no wonder advertisers have more fun overseas. Check out three TV commericals for Trojan condoms in the UK: here, here, and here. (Requires Flash.)

Like a Lunch Counter Sit-In - Taking a cue from San Francisco, four same-sex couples went to the courthouse in Fredericksburg for marriage licenses yesterday. The WaPo's coverage resounds with echoes of civil rights era marches and protests. One wonders if Equality Virginia sanctioned such a radical action. (Massachusetts by contrast is set this weekend to begin training town clerks to issue same-sex licenses.) Dyana Mason's only reported remark was "We're told, nothing will ever change here in Virginia, that you're crazy to try and do something like this."

Well, maybe. Consider Hanna Rosin's Style frontpiece on Rep. Barney Frank in Tuesday's Post. The Massachusetts congressman, a veteran of civil rights marches in the South, has been outspoken in his reluctance to support direct action on gay marriage. The article considers whether Frank simply wants to keep things safe for his beloved Democratic Party (and especially John Kerry) -- since they are viewed as "vulnerable" on this social issue. Frank protests that he really does care about the cause; he just thinks feel-good public spectacles are not good strategy.

Maybe he's got something there, but the sixty-three year old party operative admits that he's always been too pessimistic about the prospects for gay rights. (To Frank's credit, however, he did make an emotional personal statement at this week's Senate hearing on the FMA.) I think gays across the political spectrum have gotten a real charge out of finally going on the offensive, and the speed of change -- civil unions are now a moderate position nationally? -- has caught even our leaders flat footed.

To end on a humorous note: I was amused by the last quote from the Post article in which a gay couple asserts "Believe me, if you saw us in the grocery store, you'd know we were married." Reminds me of a favorite t-shirt slogan: "Two men, one cart, fresh pasta -- you figure it out!"

"The Enemy" - It's a showdown between Southworst and Arlington-based (and Mitchell favorite) U.S. Airways. Draw, pardner!

For Kids' Sake - Ben, what's your professional take on Ron Fanelle, the Camarillo, California middle school teacher who landed in hot water after confirming to his students rumors that he had recently wed his same-sex partner in San Francisco?

In a state where being gay is a protected class under employment discrimination laws, and where ballot initiative battles were once fought (and lost) trying to bar homosexuals from public school jobs, I find it remarkable that the right of a teacher to be out in the workplace could possibly be challenged. Yet the Pleasant Valley school board is investigating the incident, apparently with an eye to imposing rules on personal disclosures by gay teachers. Meanwhile, Fanelle is getting legal assistance from the CTA and NCLR.

Sounds like an interesting intersection of First Amendment rights, non-discrimination law, and the oh-so-touchy subject of sex education. (Gotta protect the kids from that evil ho-mo-sexual agenda!)

Relativity - Does A&F even have stores in West Virginia? Governor Wise once again belies his own surname by making an issue of this - similar to another stink he once made about a certain pep band halftime show.

Blinding Bolt of the Obvious - Why did it take me five viewings to understand the subtext of Gwen Stefani murdering - Chicago-style - each of her No Doubt bandmates in the video for "It's My Life"? (Hint: What typically comes after a band's greatest-hits album.)

Pink Power - Ryan Seacrest, metrosexual pink lover, has come to the aid of a group of students censured for wearing pink.

It's SLDN Annual Report Time - The gay military advocacy group released its tenth annual report yesterday, and the dailies have their usual coverage. The WP notes that DADT discharges dropped last year to their lowest level in nine years - still about two a day - citing the exigencies of wartime. The NYTimes' story emphasizes "developments that call into serious question the future of the law," including six related cases challenging the military's sodomy ban under the Lawrence ruling, as well as one discharged lieutenant colonel's lawsuit against "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" itself.

The personal stories are always the most interesting (yes, there are some cute guys) - check out the PDF report for yourself here.

Maintaining Sanctity - In more lighthearted gay marriage news, The Onion reports that President Bush is urging Iraqis to pass a constitutional amendment which would ban gay marriage. Even though the "Iraqi constitution was signed just a few short weeks ago, usher[ing] in a new era of democratic freedom in Iraq...there are some unlawful and unholy acts that the constitution's original drafters could not have possibly intended to protect."

Reinventing the Wheel - Madonna is going on tour!

I'm Bob Edwards... - But this is not Morning Edition. At least, not any more. After a twenty-five-year stint as the only official host ME has ever had, Edwards is retiring to "senior correspondent" status, following in the footsteps of former ATC co-host Susan Stamberg. Man, can't NPR update their bio photos at least once a decade? Sheesh.

Amend the Amendment - Revealed just yesterday, here's a look at the new and improved Federal Marriage Amendment (with changes marked):

Marriage in the United States shall consist only of the union of a man and a woman. Neither this Constitution, or nor the constitution of any State, nor state or federal law, shall be construed to require that marriage or the legal incidents thereof be conferred upon unmarried couples or groups any union other than the union of a man and a woman.

The purpose of the substitution, which is being offered by the sponsors of the original amendment, is to preserve the ability of states to legislatively enact civil union laws. Chalk up a victory to legalistic precision. The authors have effectively admitted that their original draft was so poorly worded that future courts would have been forced by its language to overturn such civil union laws -- something they claimed not to have intended.

Discussions about changing the amendment for "better" (allowing CUs) or "worse" (abolishing them more clearly) have been going on since the FMA was first introduced. Since the new text reflects the supposedly less-bad outcome, key FMA backers who sought exactly the opposite change are sure to be be less enthusiastic about this draft. While undercutting support among the bigot brigade is a good thing, the change may also generate support in the more moderate camps. You know, the vast middle ground of people who don't support gay marriage but are hesitant to write discrimination into the constitution. Honestly, this is a shrewd move on the part of same-sex marriage foes, and it only makes our job harder, in explaining why our founding document is no place to enshrine straight supremacy. I remain hopeful, however, that it won't overcome traditional resistance to constitutionalizing social policy, even in the face of "activist judges." It may well be that an amendment which really does almost nothing but preserve the word "marriage" for straights lacks sufficient raison d'être to make it through the grueling adoption process.

P.S. Eugene Volokh notes another drafting problem with the new text: states will be unable to grant civil unions through constitutional amendments (as opposed to legislation). My question: what happens, then, in states where the constitutions have been amended to prohibit CUs? Will any democratic attempt to undo the damage (presumably decades hence, when the prevailing bigotry has faded) be undone by the FMA? Just another example of why this unneeded "fix" to a non-existent "problem" deserves a place in the trash heap of history.

Update: The WaPo has a political analysis on the amendment ruckus. Basically, no amendment can pass, but Republicans will use the subject, including a possible House vote in late Summer, to make political points for the November election.

TEK.noh.sek.shoo.ul - "n. Dandyish narcissist in love with not only himself, but also his urban lifestyle & gadgets; a straight man who is in touch with his feminine side but has fondness for electronics such as cell phones, pda's, computers, software, and the web." I believe that even Bhaus's gay readers can relate.

Working 'Out' - I recently read a treatise about coming out at work yesterday, and then I saw an article in yesterday's Wall Street Journal (reg. req.) that made me want to weigh in on the topic myself.

The article is entitled "Amid Gay Marriage Debate, Companies Offer More Benefits to Same-Sex Couples" and while talking about benefits it also offers some specific statistics about gays in the workplace. "Among the 6% to 7% of the population who identify themselves as gay or lesbian in polls, 60% reveal their sexual orientiation to co-workers, says Wes Combs of Witeck-Combs Communications, a Washington, D.C., marketing firm. That compares with the 93% who are 'out' to friends."

Proportion of gay workers who would feel comfortable...

Displaying a photo of their partner at work: 2002 = 28% | 2003 = 44%

Discussing their social life at work: 2002 = 35% | 2003 = 54%

Introducing their partner to co-workers: 2002 = 35% | 2003 = 51%

Introducing their partner to the boss: 2002 = 32% | 2003 = 48%

All of these statistics beg the question, how do you define being "out at work"? If your co-workers know you're gay, but your boss doesn't, are you "out at work"? What about clients or external partners that you interact with?

I've been out at the three jobs I've had since graduating college. One was an gay-friendly retail (oxymoron, no?) company where I had many homo coworkers. The second was a small, crappy dot.com startup. Out of a staff of about 40, there was one lesbian and me...a surprisingly small percentage for a company located in San Francisco! Finally, at my current job, there are about 100 employees, and as far as I can tell, I'm the only gay person who works here. So I haven't really had the opportunity to band together with other gay coworkers to test the waters before coming out at work.

But even in the span of the 90 miles between the Bay Area and Sacramento, I've certainly noticed shift in the word choice of coworkers when asking about my personal life. Instead of asking "Do you have a significant other?" the question is posed, "Are you married?" or "Do you have a wife?" Subtle differences, but semantics play a big part in how I would chose to answer the questions. Depending on my audience, I might choose to answer the question with a simple yes or no, or delve into a lengthier response. "No, I'm not married" is a lot different than "No, I'm not married but I've been with my partner Kevin for the past six years." I've answered the question in both ways, and I can tell you that the latter response is much less likely to leave me feeling guilty for not being entirely forthcoming.

I really wish that there was more data to analyze so that we could assess a long-term change in the attitudes of gays in the workforce. Do the WSJ statistics strike you as accurate? Do you think that things really changed that dramatically between 2002 and 2003?

Crack is Wack Job - Things are looking pretty bleak for ol' Whitney Houston, as she finally enters rehab.

Happy St. Paddy's - Now remember, when drinking green beer tonight, please drink responsibly and avoid guzzling too many carbs!

Space Stuff - Hey NASA boy, how come we haven't heard anything from you about the recent excitement about Sedna?

"We need to keep them out of here" - Apparently their subscription to the advance sheets of U.S. Supreme Court decisions expired down in Rhea County, TN.

Not Sparing the Snark - In a post especially for Schroeder, here's a link to a story in the Guardian about how Television Without Pity influences the direction of shows, including The O.C.

And speaking of the Brits, there's a funny campaign for the UK's Channel 4 where celebrities share their favorite curse words.

On the Down Loh - Back in the salad days of the now-defunct Buzz magazine, I was a big fan of Sandra Tsing Loh's monthly column on The Valley. Her riffs on Trader Joe's and the "lesser" Los Angeles were guaranteed to amuse. More recently, half-German, half-Chinese CalTech grad has been writing books like A Year in Provence Van Nuys and offering commentary on Marketplace and the Santa Monica NPR station, KCRW.

Last week, KCRW fired Loh for a "Janet Jackson performance piece" incident: she used the word "fuck" in her prerecorded commentary and the engineer forgot to bleep it before running it on the air. Now, she's being lumped in with Howard Stern and Bubba the Love Sponge. Not such a bad place to be in terms of getting nationwide exposure for your art. Sandra was on HBO, interviewed by Salon and now tells the LA Times that she won't return to KCRW even though they've offered to reinstate her job. As Loh once said, "Public radio saved my career . . . it doesn't pay great, but the exposure is important." Seems like that statement is more true now than ever.

Hovercraft to the Rescue - Well, almost. The Red Cross is investigating landing relief supplies in DC via military-style landing craft in the event of a catastrophic terrorist attack, thereby avoiding roadways choked with fleeing refugees "even worse than ... during standard rush hour." (That's saying something.) I wondered what they were doing with the billions in 9/11 cash they raked in.

Good Cartoons - Don Asmussen's "Bad Reporter" panels are good for a chuckle. I especially liked "Gay Marriage Spreads to Mars as 'Spirit' and 'Opportunity' Wed" and "Mel Gibson's Controversial 'Starsky and Christ' Accused of Anti-Seventies-ism."

Fired Up - This week's Question Celebrity in the WaPo: what's up with The Donald's hair? And if you're not watching The Apprentice, then shame on you! Lunatic Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth makes for some good TV! Next up, possible hosting gigs!

Like K Street with Better Demographics - Discovery Times' reality show Staffers features some cute young things. Slate has a review.

#gayfrat Lives - Based on comments to the post on Andy's MW coverstory, I'm a-wondering... just how many Beaverhausen readers used to connect to the IRC channel #gayfrat? I already have many friends in Washington and elsewhere through my days online as booker-va. (Just see my Friendster link for confirmation.) Ben even met me on IRC, if not that particular channel. (Jamie and I - one the other hand - go all the way back to the Men's Corner at sleepy.net.) Maybe we should have a reunion.

Pirate Radio - Just for Poliguy, I'm posting this Wired magazine column by Lawrence Lessig on the piratical origins of the music publishing and Hollywood industries. Prof. Lessig takes these special interests to task for now championing harsh anti-piracy penalties (civil and criminal) for the same kind of "sharing" that got them started in the first place. While admitting that content creators deserve a reward for their efforts, his chief argument is that "consistent with the tradition that gave us Hollywood, radio, the music industry, and cable TV, the question we should be asking about file-sharing is how best to preserve its benefits while minimizing (to the extent possible) the wrongful harm it causes artists." Thus, the question is "one of balance," not a rout by entrenched industries at the expense of innovators who will bring us the next big thing.

Anything you type... - Can be used against you. If you didn't already know that, consider the case of Mary Ranta, who has been ordered by a judge in a Connecticut divorce proceeding not to touch her laptop, the better to preserve evidence her husband wants to use against her in court. In an unusual maneuver, the judge has ruled that Mrs. Ranta must turn over the computer but that Mr. Ranta must purchase a duplicate for her, including all of the same software. In the meantime, she must "stop using, accessing, turning on, powering, copying, deleting, removing or uninstalling any programs, files or folders, or booting up" her year-old laptop. Yikes!

Explainer - But enough about Virginia, let's get back to California, where, the LA Times explains, there's a reason that no other California mayor has followed in the footsteps of Mayor Gavin Newsom. The answer is that in California counties are the governmental agency responsible for issuing marriage licenses and San Francisco happens to be the only contiguous city-county in the state. In related news, Conan will interview the mayor of New Platz, NY tomorrow.

Attack of the SuperDOMA! - Will Virginia join Nebraska and Ohio in outlawing not only gay marriage but also civil unions, domestic partnerships and similar arrangements? We'll have to see what the quasi-gay-friendly governor Mark Warner (D) does, but for now, the following text has been enacted by the General Assembly:

"A civil union, partnership contract or other arrangement between persons of the same sex purporting to bestow the privileges or obligations of marriage is prohibited. Any such civil union, partnership contract or other arrangement entered into by persons of the same sex in another state or jurisdiction shall be void in all respects in Virginia and any contractual rights created thereby shall be void and unenforceable."

Of course the worst part about this bill is its unclear but potentially devastating effect on powers of attorney and similar private, contractual means that gay couples have used to provide a measure of protection under the law that doesn't recognize their relationships. I'd like to think the good guv'nor wouldn't let it become Virginia law, but I'm afraid it may have passed with veto-proof majorities. Maybe some activist judges can save us.

Tough Job - Add one more California-Virginia connection. The Post's "Potomac Confidential" column profiles Dyana Mason, the executive director of Equality Virginia, a former HRC staffer who previously spent several years as an environmental lobbyist on the West Coast. I'm glad she got some sympathetic press for a change, since the reception she gets from legislators in Richmond is far from kind. Not by a long shot.

Bloggers Never Rest - What, I try to spend a couple of days skiing in Utah and the whole gay marriage project goes all to Hell? Cali's Supreme Court stops the San Fran weddings (as Ben notes below), and the Massachusetts legislature lays the smack down with a constitutional amendment. Sigh. In better news, the weather here is gorgeous.

Despite the setbacks, this WaPo Style piece on the clash of partisans outside the Mass. state house ends on a couple of nice, positive notes. First, it observes how the younger generation can't "figure out what all the fuss is about," and contrasts gays even as young as 27 from those five years their junior in terms of the "different expectations about the trajectory of their lives," all because of the growing public awareness of lifelong gay couples. (I guess Drew was on to something.) Second, it describes how the Bible-thumping protestors have replaced drag queens and leather daddies as the front-page wackos in our collective media consciousness. Amend the Bible, indeed.

Proxy Blogging - While John is in Utah, he asked me to post this piece from DC's Metro Weekly -- a "Color Coded" guide to men's fashion featuring his friend Andy as the model. One question, why would they put a redhead in so many orange and tan outfits? Wouldn't have been my first choice, but then again, I'm no Carson Kressley.

Creative License - From Seattle, the latest news is that Dan Savage did agree to get married...to a lesbian! In an attempt to point out the absurdity of being denied a marriage license to wed his boyfriend of 10 years, but being able to obtain one to marriage a lesbian coworker, Dan visited the Kings County clerk this week. The full story is available on The Stranger.

P.S. Drew posted excerpts from Dan's article, but didn't link to it!

Unintended Consequences - Seems as though Bush's catering to the conservative Christian crowd has resulted in an unforseen reaction from none other than Howard Stern. I'm not a Stern listener, but apparantly, he's been railing against the President lately about the federal marriage amendment, stem cells and, of course, the FCC indency policy. The publisher of the nonpartisan magazine that covers news/talk radio indicated that his research shows that some in "the 30- to 40-year-old range who were Bush supporters are rethinking that position and turning away from Bush because of what Howard Stern has been saying." The enemy of my enemy is my friend, right?

Like, Totally - Just in case you missed it the first time around (like me), VH1 is rerunning Totally Gay this week, as a companion to its all new sequel, Totally Gayer. Between these two shows and Playing It Straight, TiVos around the country will be packed with homo content! And for even more hype about Playing, see these links to the Boston Herald and to gay.com.

Going to the Courthouse - San Francisco won't be holding any more gay weddings...at least for a while. The California Supreme Court stopped the weddings, but will hear the case in May or June. Stay tuned!

A Big Fat Goodbye to Kirstie - Finally, those Thom Fillicia ads for Pier 1 are premiering. And that gives the NY Times the perfect entree to delve into the world of gay celebrity spokesmodels.

One of these spokesmodels includes Thom's useless Queer Eye peer Jai Rodriguez. One marketing executive said about Jai's participating in a campaign for mints: "It doesn't matter if he's gay or not. We looked at who we could use as a lifestyle spokesperson, and he's fabulous." So being gay doesnt matter, but fabulousness does. The two aren't interchangable?

Fabulousness must count for a lot, because even though gay marriage is a very contentious issue, the "gay identity is now at a level in the popular culture that it can be accessed for this role in ads aimed at the general market, especially showing gays as trend-setters and arbiters of taste." So, listen to our recommendations on what to eat, what to wear and what to buy and what to do, but marriage is a sacred institution between a one man and Britney Spears in Vegas.

Savage Beating (Others to the Courthouse) - Beaverhausen fave Dan Savage is in the news as gay marriage proponents make a stand in Seattle. The supporters were working to find an ideal couple to serve as a test case in the Washington state courts, but it looks like the editor of The Stranger and author of Savage Love may beat them to the punch. The concern is that Dan's agenda may include wanting to garner publicity for himself and his paper, not just fighting for marriage rights.

Making Whoopi - Gay marriage can be funny! So says Whoopi Goldberg, who will feature same-sex nuptuals on her sitcom. Who knew Whoopi was still on the air!

Praying Back Your Hymen - The lauded absintence education efforts don't seem to be paying off. According to a new study virginity pledges by teenagers are kept by only 12% of pledgers. While such pledges may delay sexual activity, it certainly isn't stopping premarital relations from occurring. And furthermore, STD rates are the same for pledgers and non-pledgers, as pledgers are less likely to use contraception when they actually do Do It.

Homophobia, Defined - "You ride a Burton? Dude, that's so gay." This advertising pitch, recently employed by competing snowboard manufacturer K2/Ride, seems more childish than bigoted. I prefer to reserve the word "homophobia" for more serious matters, like the pathological disgust some people have for same-sex relations or the impulsive hatred and violence of a gay-bashing. School yard taunts seem to be in a different category altogether, since they usually demonstrate simple ignorance, a lack of social graces and general immaturity. And hey, that seems to fit snowboarders pretty well, if you ask me. Heh.

Don't Be Afraid of your Freedom - Check out the hot guy in the new Gap ad. (Right-click, choose "play." Requires Flash.) The new spots take me back to those classic Lisa Prisco commercials for Khakis Swing, Khakis Groove and Khaki Soul. But are the marketeers at Two Folsom Street trending older these days? Stressfree Khakis dude - with his fuzzy chest and rugged masculinity - is no Orlando Bloom.

Your Vote Counts (Kinda) - Since Rock the Vote has been such a successful campaign (not), here comes a new proposal from the California legislature to give the youth vote a shot at making their voices heard. That is, 14 year olds would get one-quarter of a vote and 16 year olds would get one-half of a vote in the state election process. What happened to one man, one vote? Yes, California had one of the lowest turnouts ever for the primary election last week, but I'm not convinced that "training wheels for responsible citizens" is going to do any good.

An initiative to call our own - Whaddya know? D.C. has direct democracy too. Just see SmokefreeDC's ballot initiative, which may or may not make it this year, depending on the restaurant industry's unsubtle legal machinations.

Bluetoothing - Gizmodo notes a new trend among techno-sluts. "Toothing" is seeking anonymous sex partners in public places by means of one's Bluetooth-enabled mobile phone or PDA. These devices are capable of discovering nearby users with similar technology and sending them short messages - in this case, messages about gettin' it on. This seems like a natural outgrowth of a far less productive activity known as "bluejacking."

Hmm, my crappy Verizon cell phone can't do these wacky tricks. How about yours, Ben?

TiVo Alert - Fox's Playing It Straight premieres at 8pm on Friday. Jamie and I will be watching from our cozy lil ski condo in Park City, Utah, but I think I'll set the TiVo just the same. Schroeder, I know you'll be keeping tabs on Louis, the brokerage firm manager from Fort Worth. Any other favorites? And more importantly, which way do you think they swing? Place your bets now.

BONUS: Speaking of TiVo, you know how cool I am? So cool that I've been invited to be a TiVo beta tester. Sorry, the NDA says I can't reveal what we're testing, but you can imagine that it's something way better than you've ever seen. Heh heh.

Amend This! - They don't seem to have included a "defense of marriage" clause in the new Iraqi Bill of Rights. But then that's not the only improvement on the American model. Iraqis have an "ERA" guaranteeing equal rights for women, and there's an explicit right to privacy, among other things. Despite those discrepancies, it is interesting to see how many of the crucial freedoms the Founding Fathers had nailed down two and a quarter centuries ago.

Blind Justice - Are any of us really disturbed by Scalia's appearances at anti-gay functions? Screw impartiality - it's just nice to know exactly where we stand with the jerk.

Warning: Sports Content Ahead - Don't tune out just yet, Ben! With a victory over Dartmoth on Saturday, the Princeton Tigers have clinched the Ivy title and a berth in the NCAA basketball tournament. Their only Ivy loss has come against perennial contender Penn, and the teams play again in a meaningless matchup on Tuesday. With their lackluster out-of-conference performances and a potential loss to the Quakers looming, a 16th seed in March Madness seems a strong possibility for the heralded sons of Old Nassau.

For Ben's sake, I'll explain why that's significant. As he is likely unaware, the number-one-ranked Stanford men had gone undefeated all season until Saturday's game against the Huskies. Despite the loss, they will probably be seeded first in one of the four regional playoff brackets. Ergo - a one-in-four chance of meeting the Tigers in round one. (Maybe better odds than that, since the selection committee loves to set up interesting contests, what with all the advertising dollars that follow them.) So what do you think, Ben? A friendly wager may be in the offing. Stay tuned - Selection Sunday is less than a week away.

First Draft of History - The Post must think it is the Blade, as Washington's major daily jostles to become the national gay paper of record. So it seems when the WaPo issues a satisfying Page A1 retrospective on "how we got here" in the rush to battle over gay marriage. I thought the allusion to a poker game was apt, where each side's actions and reactions are likened to the bids and raises in a high stakes showdown. The article also had a great quote on Gavin Newsome's reaction while sitting in on the Bush State of the Union address that blasted same-sex marriage. "I started looking around as people were giving standing ovations and applauding and cheering wildly. . . . I thought I was on another planet." From San Francisco? Well, yeah.

BONUS: Catching up with last week's news, here's the pro-gay marriage cover story from the Economist.

Not-So-Good Things! - Martha really is going to prison! She was found guilty! The Emmy nod is small consolation now.

Take Your Pick - There's a fight brewing in Annapolis over which should be Maryland's official state sport: the incumbent jousting, which has held the title for 42 years, or lacrosse, the up-and-coming sport of American Pie and A&F ads. This is easy to decide. Lacrosse players are hot, while jousting is just gay.

Wal-Mart Wins! - What, still no comment on the end to the Southern California grocery store strike lockout, Ben?

BEN RESPONDS: The strike is over, what do I care now? ;-) My mom can finally go back to her local Pavillions, where the workers will be footing part of their own health care insurance bills just like the rest of us. Wal-Mart isn't out of the woods quite yet though: there's a lack of space in most urban areas for their supercenters and many cities are voting to oppose Wal-Mart.

Veeps - Drew publishes an advice email about the dream Democratic ticket - Kerry/Satan. But I thought that Bush has committed to keeping Cheney. Ba dum dum.

Palsgraf Flashback - We haven't covered an HIV-disclosure case in a long time here at the Bhaus, so it's a good time to note this bizarre Chicago Tribune story.

I've advocated before that HIV-positive people need to disclose their status to their sex partners. Now here is a case where the parents of a poz man lied and misrepresented to his fiance why he was sick. While the two never married, they did have unprotected sex and the bride-to-be went three years before she knew she had been infected. Now she has a jury award of $2 million against the deceased groom's elderly parents.

While novel, the outcome demonstrates that, even where there is no statute requiring disclosure of HIV status, individuals may be civilly liable for negligent or intentional actions - in this case concealment or misrepresentation of a communicable disease - that result in harm. This maxim is no less true for this unusual medical injury than it is for business fraud. Anyone can be held responsible for the foreseeable consequences that are proximate result of his or her actions.

UPDATE: As it happens, the Virginia General Assembly is poised to pass a law making it a class 6 felony to have sex without disclosing that you're HIV+ (assuming you know).

That's My Queue - What's the other reason people are lined up in San Francisco? To visit the new Apple store of course. The writer of the NYT piece mentions this gay angle multiple times, saying "...while some gay couples have been waiting their whole adult lives for a chance to marry, no Apple customer can claim to have been deprived of opportunities to buy its merchandise." In the Home and Garden section of the paper, no less.

Word Association - How do we feel about Kerry backing separate but equal legal unions for gay couples, granting all 1049 rights of marriage, but not using the word marriage? I have to say, I think I'm okay with it. One generation from now, the people who currently make up the oldest demographic of Americans will no longer be voting, and we'll easily be able to reconcile the marriage issue. In the meantime, *I* could actually take advantage of a legal union, and really, that's what it's all about, isn't it?

Coming Out Fighting - Thanks to Schroeder for this TV tidbit (second item): A Philly newsman, 22-year-old John Ogden, was so outraged by Bush's support for the FMA that he has come out publicly, making the WCAU traffic reporter the first gay TV news personality in Philadelphia and one of the few in the country. As if. Everyone knows most weathermen are queer as three-dollar bills, even if Norfolk's is a born-again.

Joining Forces - This is one funny cartoon, even if it is based on a "true" story.

Buyer's Remorse - Ben, as happy as you are with your AT&T wireless service, you can appreciate this WaPo article discussing how Cingular just bought themselves a bunch of disgruntled customers.

Mate-o-matic 2000 - My perfect match, in terms of physical attractiveness to me, lies somewhere between him and him. That's the outcome of a scientific photo-based test I took at Match.com. I ran through the test kind of quickly, but supposedly it works best if you go by your gut. Fair enough - I think it came out mostly right.

Here are some of the psychological conclusions the test drew about what physical attributes I look for in a man:

• First off, I'm officially "picky," being drawn to "the most handsome of the handsome." I am more selective than most men "my age." What does that mean? I could be a great casting agent, because I have a good eye for men who have "star quality." Well, I guess since I'm not actually looking for a mate, I can afford to choose the best of the best, right?
• My body-type preferences ranged from "meso-endomorph" - big and strong - to "endomorph" - solid and stocky. A meso has big bones, noticable in his wide shoulders and thick wrists, and muscular shoulders, which are "perfect for resting your head on," not to mention "big strong arms to wrap around you." [grin] An endo is not overweight, but his big bones, muscles, and overall mass make him "hard to miss." "His broad shoulders and big arms convey a sense of safety." Damn, they really got me here.
• I'm drawn to men with pointed-square chins and brown eyes. I may not have been aware, but those "smoldering brown eyes" apparently stood out to me on an unconscious level. Supposedly they "give the impression of softness and mystery." A strong, masculine nose was also a big turn-on for me, although I liked men with a variety of noses. Hmm, Jamie has caramel eyes and a Roman nose...
• Men with a soft smile or grin seemed more appealing to me than men with big "toothy" smiles. I am told the preference for soft smiles fits my overall interest in men who appear "honest warm, and approachable." Well, duh.
• Surprisingly, I found out that a good head of hair is "a real turn on" for me. While I liked men with a variety of hair styles, I seemed to have a special interest in men with full, wavy hair, which tend to give men a certain "boyish" quality. I'm also drawn to a shorter, masculine cut; longer hair on men is too feminine for my taste. The test says that I can appreciate an attractive man with a shaved head, though it tells me that look isn't what I find most appealing. Sorry, honey!
• Less shocking is my attraction towards facial hair on the right man. Men with neatly-trimmed beards or goatees seem to get "a second glance." Maybe I find masculine-looking men especially appealing or maybe I "just like the way beards tickle in all the right places!" [Girlish giggle.] I am also attracted to a hairy chest on the right man, fitting my overall preference for the masculine. Apparently, even a little hair on a man's back is not going to be a turn off. [Heh.]

Brawny woofsters with facial scruff and shaggy hair? What a surprise. So far, so good - and damn close to the guy I wake up next to most mornings - well, except for the hair part. (I did not consciously try to match myself to Jamie.)

In addition to my prime matches, I had a very good group of "maybes." It's interesting that they were not selected for me, since I thought I gave them high marks. But the test also asks you which men would make good dates. The software speculated that I was "under-selling" myself to some of the hotties or that I had a bad reaction based on experience with men who looked like them.

Anyways, dear Bhaus readers, give the test a try and post your own results in the comments for all to see. It's fun.

Baby Stewie Alert - I was a latecomer to the Family Guy party, but I'm excited to relay that the show is coming back to a TV near you in 2005.

Obligatory Gay Marriage Post of the Day - Not all the gays in California are running to San Francisco to be married. Just look at the examples cited in this story about the older gay community in the Orange County City of Laguna Beach and how this crowd of longtime partners is disinclined to marry. But aren't these precisely the kind of committed, loving, older couples we need to make our case? We need a counterbalance to the pervasive stereotypes, says the Boston Globe: "America may embrace gay men who don't stray too far from stereotypes -- it's no mistake that the cliched and flamboyant [Carson] Kressley is also the most popular figure -- but it isn't as easily accepting of gay men with political opinions and relationships of their own for which they demand legal recognition." But we are making headway in other arenas, as the Supreme Court has allowed 2nd-parent adoptions to stand.

The Juror - Maria Shriver has been seated as a juror in a in product liability trial. Her new position as California First Lady aside, shouldn't those Dateline investigations rule her out?

Proxy Blogging - Ben is busy so I will blog this item on his behalf: The president of Baylor University, the largest Baptist school in the world, has released a statement of outrage at his colllege paper's editorial in favor of gay marriage. The student publications watchdog board has also slapped down the editors for violating school policy. Well, at least the drama distracts from the NCAA violations and murders going on in their basketball program, so it must be quite a relief for poor President Sloan.

UPDATE: The LATimes covers the story and mentions that Sloan and the Lariat editorial board have had their differences in the past, including once when they stated that the President should resign over a vote of no confidence by the faculty.

You Killed HB1016! You Bastards! - Maybe Jamie was right about leaving Virginia, since the Commonwealth is plainly not ready to move into the 1990s yet, let alone modern times. I can't tell you how disappointed I am in my birth state for being the last to liberalize domestic partner health insurance.

The roll of dishonor for this egregiously anti-business and gratuitously anti-gay vote includes nine Republican state senators: Wampler (Wise), Chichester (Stafford), Norment (Yorktown), Stosch (Henrico), Stolle (Virginia Beach), Williams (Newport News), Wagner (Virginia Beach), Newman (Bedford) and Rerras (Norfolk). Only four Democrats and two Republicans - one from northern Virginia and one from Richmond - voted against "continuing" (i.e. killing) the bill.

On a side note, I would certainly think this shelves any plans for hard DP benefits for UVa employees this year.

Now Boarding - I love to jump on a bandwagon, and here's the one for today: Kohl's is opening new stores in Northern California, including one two miles from our house. Maybe I'll drop by the "soft opening" this evening. I haven't been this excited since I heard that Sacramento was getting a PF Changs! ;-)

Fine By Me - After some shrill denunciations from California gay groups, Schwarzenegger actually comes out in favor of gay marriage in the Golden State, "if the people change their minds." The Governator spoke on the Tonight Show last night, where he and Gray Davis appeared to promote today's budget and debt referendum. How was their comedy routine, Ben?

"Hitch" - I wish Christopher Hitchens had a blog.

Bud Bundy! Natalie Green! Donna Martin! If you don't know who these characters are, then stop reading now. I don't want to know you. But if you do...read on! The WB has a potentially fantastic new program premiering Friday called The Help, featuring our friends from Married...With Children, The Facts of Life and Beverly Hills, 90210. Oh yeah, and Al Santos from Grosse Pointe also stars! My Tivo finger is already itching.

Rabble-Rousing and its Consequences - On the day when a Virginia Senate committee is considering legalizing DP benefits for private employers, the local paper in Charlottesville has come out with an excellent article on the fracas over benefits at Mr. Jefferson's university.

As you will recall, recent grads Andy Borchini and Andy Bond founded a website called DontGiveToUVa.com - proposing that until gay employees get health and other DP benefits, alumni should give to their group rather than the school. I had raised both general questions about the wisdom of impulsive donating and specific concerns about the punitive goal of the Andys' website - which begged the question of whether UVa even possessed legal authority to grant the privileges which they claimed it was denying.

The Daily Progress article relates how the official organization of gay employees at Virginia has "distanced itself" from the DontGive movement, taking exception to its "aggressive tone" and claiming that it may be "leaving the very people they aim to help vulnerable to criticism and possibly harassment." A leader among the gay employees says Borchini and Bond meant well but were "'naïve' about the complicated history of the issue at the university."

The report provides much needed background on the DP benefits question, including the prior attempts to raise the issue at the school and across the Commonwealth. Among the things we learn: While prior action never got past a faculty senate meeting, it looks like university President John Casteen is actually considering options as I write. Also, William & Mary got creamed in the General Assembly when they tried to force this issue in the 1990s, so one can understand the reluctance of Virginia to push their luck. Finally, we learn that the state attorney-general has "issued an opinion that agencies are under the control of the state legislature." Not a conclusive decision, but the university would surely be inviting a lawsuit it could easily lose by opposing the AG.

However ill-informed the DontGivers were - Borchini apparently didn't know the UVa Pride group existed before he started his protest site - it appears that the controversy has given new impetus for employees and the administration to work together on a solution. As with much activism, some good may well come through inadvertence. Stay tuned for the next update.

Culture Wars II, or Too Much Ado? - The "official" GOP homos may be in what can only be described as a tizzy over Bush's FMA remarks, but the NYTimes notes that W is probably finished talking up the subject for a good while. Bush may try to stay serenely above the fray, but "marriage panic" seems to have hit all sides of the debate. I wonder whether all the gay Republicans who declared, in the midst of last week's heated media environment, that they could no longer support George Bush for president will really sit on the sidelines come November. Especially as Edwards unexpectedly channels Dean, and Kerry careens to the left to keep his mandate within the Democratic Party.