Love Won Out - You'll have to excuse my display of bipolar disorder about all the same-sex marriage hubbub recently. I can't help debating tactics in my own head.

The extreme moderate in me recoils against the revolutionary fervor of the gay-marriage-at-all-costs crowd. "Baby steps!" I cry. "Think of the DP health benefits!" But then I wonder: Am I being a coward to cringe before the backlash? To bemoan that we're driving middle America into the arms of the bigot brigade? Maybe there comes a time to consider that nothing's gained when nothing's ventured. Maybe we should relish a stand-up fight for once.

We may not win the battle, and we could certainly end up battered and bruised for it. But as one who believes firmly in the righteousness of the cause - that gays are equal in every way before man and God - I don't doubt our ultimate victory for a moment. Any setback for us is but temporary - any victory for discrimination but fleeting. That's got to put real fear into the hearts of our enemies!

These thoughts occur to me when I see the simple, powerful images of longtime gay partners wedding in the halls of justice in San Francisco. (Think how much more effective those scenes will be come May in Massachusetts, when the marriage licenses will be for real.) The simple message being delivered into hearts all across the country is a new one for our movement. Notes one observer:

When the gay rights movement focused on marriage, it changed the image of homosexual America. Today the gay poster couples are middle-aged parents with a kid, a golden retriever and a soccer schedule. The 'gay agenda' is a wedding.

Maybe it will finally start sinking in that homosexuality fundamentally is about love, not sex. Who can be opposed to that? It's given me a new courage to face the haters, too. Contrasted with devoted gay couples are the shrill, spitting visages of our most ardent foes - whose "family values" message is finally exposed for the bilious loathing it really is. How can you be scared of that? You almost have to laugh.

Okay, so the maybe I need to chill on the manic as much as on the depressive. LOL. I can't say I'm not still scared. But I see a silver lining. And it's not like we can stuff this genie back in the bottle. So onward to victory, homo soldiers!